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THE PENCOPAL PROJECT

2004-08-24 - 9:39 a.m.

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY…

¨ In the immortal words of Sir Ice Cube, “I didn’t even have to use my AK, I gotta say it was a good day.” The sun is out. I’m madly in love. I slept through the night. Kerry leads the polls in Pennsylvania. Today’s the last day I’ll see this desk for six days, because I’m flying to Florida tomorrow for some drunken fun in the sun, or maybe rain, depending on weather.com’s accuracy.

¨ I didn’t realize how long it had been since I’d slept without waking up to piss or think, until I opened my eyes 30 seconds before my alarm rang and thought, “Holy shit, I just slept through the night.” Usually my brain clicks on between 2 a.m. and 3 a.m. and either attempts to figure out something that’s bothering me, or to write something I'll never remember when I wake up. Very annoying.

¨ So I was listening to Edie Brickell’s Shooting Rubberbands album, and I realized it’s not depressing at all. I was operating under a misconception because every time I listen to it, I think of my freshman college roommate, Kyoto, listening to “Circle of Friends” while drinking a beer and silently crying. Three times a week for a year. In hindsight, I think she was manic depressive. Half the time it was crying in her Coors Light, and the other half of the time it was sipping vodka and flinging her hair around to this really cool Japanese music that I grew to love. I wish I could remember the name of that band. There’s something liberating about listening to happy music in a different language, because even though you haven’t a clue what they’re saying, the emotion still comes across.

…FOR THREESOMES

¨ In my ongoing efforts to torture my boyfriend, I drank many margaritas at Jose Tejas and asked him whether he wanted to have a threesome. Pastori-i thinks I’m a bitch for getting The Honey’s hopes up by asking questions about the new black (anal) and the new anal (threesomes). But here's a list of some items Pastori-i tried to smuggle into Canada. He's too much of a perve for his opinion to count. I’m not being a tease, I’m making sure The Honey doesn’t have any fucked up fantasies that I’ll never be able to fulfill. The conversation went something like this:

“Do you ever want to have a threesome?”

“What, did you clone yourself?”

“You’re the fucking best. I’d give you a blowjob right here, but children are present.”

“It’s cool. There’s always later.”

“But seriously, is that something you’re interested in? And don’t give me that lame ass answer you offered up about the anal, which kind of indicated that if I was into it, you’d be, too.”

“No, I really don’t see a need for us to have a threesome.”

“Cool. It’s just that, I don’t want it to get boring after we’ve been fucking for like, 20 years, and you’re all, let’s have a threesome. Because I’d get really jealous and I totally couldn’t deal with it.”

“Right. Why don’t you have another margarita?”

So maybe that’s not verbatim, but it was something like that.

ONE LAST THOUGHT

Bush’s henchmen are really trying to do a job on Kerry and his record. To me, the bottom line is this: While there may be discrepancies between the two camps regarding exactly what happened on March 13, 1969, the end result was that the military chose to recognize Kerry with a purple heart. Here’s the closest thing to a purple heart that Bush will ever have. [via] ‘Nuff said. Enjoy your week. If you get bored, go see this. It's one of the most visually pleasing movies I've ever seen.

 

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